A Stitch In Time Saves Nine . . . and You Can Count On That!

Elizabeth and I have a very old quilt that
was made by Hulda, her grandmother. We
remembered it was tucked away in an old
wooden chest. Almost together, we thought . . .
it is so beautiful. At least we could place it
on the top of our made-up bed each
morning . . . but not use it for a cover
during the night.
                         
            That was a good decision!

The other day, I wondered just how many
individual stitches that Elizabeth's grandmother
had made to create the quilt. So . . . using a
magnifying glass, I dutifully counted them.

                          Each one.
         Came up with thirteen thousand,
                    nine hundred, and
                          forty two!

Some folks must be thinking that I have a lot
of time on my hands. Actually, I took a shortcut
in counting the stitches, by measuring the quilt
(5 X 8 feet) and then carefully counting the
number of stitches in just one of the 12 X 12 inch
quilt squares. Pretty clever, I'd say . . .

I figured that I was counting on doing a lot more
that day than to use it up counting.

           That was another good decision!

Some day I am determined to count the number of
granulated sugar crystals there are in a 4 lb (l.8kg)
bag of white sugar. (The bag says that the sugar is
"Naturally Fat-Free and has only 15 Calories
PER TSP.")

           Maybe, I will pass on that project.

                     That could possibly
                            be still yet
                              another
                         good decision!

Prayer is heard

prayer is heard
even though 
not always
in ways
we think it
will surely
come      

 
                          -This piece came to me early this morning
                            even before I awoke. It is written
                            the best I remember.
                            Now . . . I have come to believe that
                            it has something to do with Advent . . .
   

ARE OYSTER REALLY NOISY?

Just returned from
the local food mart to
buy a couple of cans of
oysters.

Each Christmas Eve, for
as long as I remember,
the tradition was to serve
oyster stew for the
evening meal.
(Of course,not all of the
family liked it.)

But still. . .
it was all we had.

I recall the childhood
ditty:

   What kind of a
         noise annoys 
                 an oyster???

   A noisy noise
         annoys
       an oyster.

Go ahead . . . try it . . .

and then

convince a group of
friends to repeat it,
like a mantra for the
Christmas Season!

Mowing the Lawn in December

So . . . there I am

following behind our

bright-red, trusty, self-propelled,

gas lawn mower.

One with a high performance,

easy start, over head cam, engine.

So what if it is 

        mid-December.

There will be

stranger occurrences

as climate change

persists.

Anyway -

     grasslets are

             green and growing!

                      Daylily bulbs are

             sending up

                       their shoots.

     Thank heavens . . . crocuses

             have good sense to

                       stay submerged.

                                          For now -

                                         

   

Amazing That Spell-Check Didn't Catch It!

I join many who are concerned about gun violence in the U.S.
Recently, I took it upon myself to write a satirical summary of
recent media reports on the dramatic surge of national gun
sales. What follows is a comprehensive compilation of a very
complicated issue.

A gum-buying surge appears to be unparalleled, with crowds
jumping the gum and flocking to area gum shows. According
to gum-maker industry executives, buyers deluge stores in
search of unusually potent varieties of gums as well as high
capacity chewing gum packs. All this fervor, even allowing for
the normal escalation in gum sales that predictably follow
increases in gas prices.

All in all, this represents a pretty dramatic uptick in demand
within just one month. The National Gum Association (NGA)
says that of special note are the record runs on "military-style"
gums (products intentionally augmented with special whiteners
and brighteners) that assault teeth with a promise to eliminate
"problems" overnight. It seems that some will do whatever it
takes to become top gum.

Certain outlets report that the highest sale of gums are those
sold in high-capacity canisters designed for the Chiclets A48's
holding as many as fifty-three gums at a time!

All this "emptying shelves market fury" is leading got a consumer
demand for sweeping proposals to revise existing gum control
laws such as:

    -Even more stringent background checks.
    -Prior to purchases, conduct on-site customer exams with
     special attention given to those persons with loose teeth, unstable
     dentures, serious overbite, etc.
    -Improved gum-ingredient laboratory analysis with specific
     attention given to higher-than-normal levels of chicle.

Meanwhile, gums continue to literally shoot off the shelves and
fly out the door in spite of strong and persistent gum lobby opposition.

Chew on that!


                          *Brands included in this market survey-report:
                                 Bazooka, Zapp, Turbo, Big Red, Cinnaburst,
                                 Dentyne, Doublemint, Double Bubbel, Eclipse,
                                 Chiclets, Excel, Freedent, Hubba Bubba,
                                 Hoodia, Orbit, Tidalwave, and Trident.