Thank You Public Radio . . .

This past week, we headed to Subway for our favorite lunch order - seafood, piled high with so many veggies that they fall out all the edges as you sink your teeth into this delicacy.

Clem went in to order, while I sat in the car listening to classical Public Radio, windows rolled down to let a lovely summer day float through the car.

I sat there absorbed in the music. It was a rousing rendition of Saint Saens' Danse Macabre (in English, its name translates to "Dance of Death"). This composition is a tone poem - in which its composer used the music to depict visual images of ghouls dancing away.

Horrors - but not about the music! My reverie and enjoyment became interpreted by a very public quarrel between a couple. The man was doing most of the shouting and using the s-word and the f-word liberally.

And double horrors - their car was parked next to the driver's side of my car. The only way I could roll the window up was to get out of the car - and I definitely did not want to encounter this verbally abusive man in any manner.

What to do?! I did not want to have my air polluted by his vile language (not that I don't use the s-word occasionally). Meanwhile, Danse Macabre played on - oblivious to what was happening to me. And then the little light bulb in my head lit up!

Gradually, I turned up the volume. The closer they got to my car - and the louder their dispute - the more I turned up the volume. Until the orchestra was all I could hear. Meanwhile, Clem could hear the whole thing from across the parking lot. He knew exactly what his dear wife was up to.

Eventually, the couple got into their car and drove away, a five-year old, blond-haired little girl trying to be invisible in the back seat. Just then, the piece came to its ending quiet measures - the dance was over and the ghouls retreated to wherever ghouls go when they are not dancing. The timing could not have been more impeccable.

I sat in the car laughing and laughing. I have no idea if these two feuding people ever caught on to what I was doing or whether they were so immersed that they did not notice other heads turn toward them as they shredded each other into pieces. I know I will never hear this familiar piece of music again, without remembering my unusual use of it to spare me from all those f-words and s-words. Hopefully, I will not hear it in a public concert, for I will have to work very hard to squelch my laughter - the kind of concert that if you cough, six people turn around and glare at you.

Thank you Public Radio. I shall have to give you an extra donation this year for providing service beyond the call of duty.