Saturday, May 4, 2013

Untitled Until Later II

Poetry is an oral and written art form. It is meant to be read both in silence and aloud. Today, much of the poetry that is written is free-style. Here, poetry becomes a visual art - the white spaces on the page as important as the words themselves. And such poetry relies on a rhythm and music embedded within its words.

When I sent my poem, "Untitled Until Later" to my dear friend Carol, who is a marvelous poet, she asked if she might suggest some changes. When I received her efforts back, I said WOW! What an illustration of the visual importance of a piece of poetry.

Below are the results of our collaboration.

trees      bewildered     by continuing snow
stark    bare       silhouettes against grey sky
waiting       for the signal to explode in green
when     this prolonged winter      becomes summer
                                            in one day

tiny     white snowdrops
hopeful sentinels      bloom under May snows
buried bulbs     hesitant         to push upward
Arctic melt carries seals          on ice-floes
                           blown far southward

fearful       frightened people
reach for stability         in the absence
of seasonal cycles    a stability      no longer
existing        they are afraid to trust
                              any sudden warmth

inept           brothers bomb innocence
shatter illusions          of safety
a thirsty nation       devours every detail
in a media frenzy          so many questions
                                      elude answers

during grey days       winter-weary people
collectively search         for some assurance
crying out      for anchors        they cannot find
while heavy air            saturated with chaos
                                      hangs over all

trees    frozen symbols      in time and space
everyone        uncertain       of any future 
waiting        for something not named
for    what lies ahead         what is possible
                             beyond imagination

                     still having hope

Now scroll back to my entry on Monday, April 29th. Read this first version out loud. Then come back to this entry and also read it out loud. At first glance, this latter version looks jerky and abrupt with all the spaces within the lines. But surprisingly - there is music embedded here too.

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